These 40 questions to ask coworkers are grouped by how someone likes to work, the projects they care about, the team and a couple about life outside work. Use them in a first one-on-one, over lunch or at the start of a meeting. Most can be answered in a sentence, which matters at work, where people have less time and more reason to keep things professional.
When to ask
Good moments include:
- Onboarding, when new teammates expect introductory conversations
- Team lunches or coffee chats, when the setting is informal
- The first few minutes of a meeting, when there is time for one question
- One-on-ones, when there is room for a longer answer
- Team social events, when getting to know each other is the point
Avoid personal questions in the middle of a deadline or when someone is clearly focused.
For remote teams
- Post a question of the week in a team chat and let people answer when they have time.
- Open a video call with one question before the agenda.
- Give new hires a few questions for their first virtual coffee chats.
- Rotate who asks so the same person isn’t always leading.
What not to ask at work
Some topics put people in an awkward spot with colleagues, and more so with a manager. Leave these alone unless the other person raises them:
- age, pregnancy or plans to have children
- health, disability or medication
- religion and politics
- relationship status or who someone lives with
- salary and personal finances
- where someone is “really” from
Also avoid questions that ask people to criticize a colleague who isn’t there, or to rate their own team in front of their manager.
An invitation from a manager can feel compulsory. Say that passing is welcome, keep personal questions out of performance discussions, and don’t record or pass around private answers.
More questions
For people outside work, try questions to get to know someone. For a group warm-up, use icebreaker questions.